Explained Out

               “None at all? I mean, do you even- by yourself?”

                Logan narrowed his eyes. “You always ask people about their sex lives?” Three days into this rooming situation, and Logan was already finding himself on the defensive. He had hoped to escape some of the hypersexualized society high school had bred.

                “Well, no,” the guy said defensively.

                Retorts ran rampant in Logan’s head- how often do you fuck? Who do you fuck? Does it mean anything to you beyond primal mashing of sweaty bodies- but he stayed quiet. Instead, Logan pulled out his chemistry textbook and settled his back against the wall as he sat on his bed. They’d split the room about fifty-fifty, but it was so small he felt suffocated by the other’s presence.

                “I’m going out tonight with some friends. We’re going to check out the downtown scene.” The guy paused, scratched his chin. “Wanna come?”

                Peering over the edge of the book, Logan watched the guy fidget and tried to remember his name. “No, I’ve got some studying to do.” As an afterthought, “Thanks, though.”

                “Anytime,” the guy muttered and moved around the room.

He made a lot of noise, clattering things on his desk, slamming drawers, but Logan managed to ignore most of it. He flipped pages occasionally to keep up the pretense of reading, hoping the guy would chose to leave soon. He had to have a class or something, right?

A knock sounded at the door, freeing them from the awkward quietness and at the same time heightening the stress pouring through Logan’s veins. They both paused, and it was the other guy who called out, “Come in!”

The door slid open quietly and a familiar face covered in freckles. Carl. The roommate stared at the intruder with a questioning scrunch of the face, but Logan smiled widely.

“Come on in,” Logan said putting his book down. The short kid slipped inside, shutting the door as quietly as he opened it, and climbed onto the bed after a brief pause casting a look at the other guy in the room. Logan gave a slight shake of the head letting Carl know he wasn’t going to introduce them.

The kid- mere months younger than Logan but far less confident- sat with his own back against the wall and bumped his leg up against Logan’s. He was a very physical person, using the touch as a calming method. Logan was happy to help, not minding the coping mechanism at all. He sat a hand on Carl’s knee.

“You ready for tomorrow?”

Carl shrugged his shoulders.

“I’ll come by your room early, ‘kay?”

This time he nodded, and his face lifted some of the stress-lines away. “Yeah.” He tipped his head over onto Logan’s shoulder while Logan pulled his chemistry book back out.

“I thought you were asexual…” the roommate made himself known again.

“What?” Logan glanced over the top of the book once more, thinking that he would be having a lot of conversations that way.

He pointed between the two guys on the bed. “You guys are together?” His face pulled up again in a scrunched way that made him look like he was constipated.

“We’re friends,” Carl whispered and pulled away. His freckled cheeks ran red.

Logan pulled him back over, not allowing anyone dictate the way his friendships worked. “Just friends. Again, not any of your business. Unless you wanna swap stories, tell me about your penis?” He may have just snapped. Logan immediately regretted it and bit down on his tongue.

The guy reeled back and shook his head, looking down at his feet. “Nah, I was just. Never mind.” He grabbed his bag, waved goodbye and ducked out of the room.

Logan sighed and sunk back into himself. He should have just explained. Talked about it. The guy wouldn’t understand until it was explained to him. Logan was just tired of being the one to explain himself. He guessed he’d have to talk to the guy- and find out his name- tomorrow.